Calisthenics October 21/22, 1980
- Participate from the Field --Things as Functions --Reflexion of Function --Action Brings the Change --Working with the A Function --Sense of Power --Experiment:Spaceless and Timeless ---Live Nothingness -- Now
Every time you have the opportunity to bring something field-wise into this room, do it. In this way you learn to Participate. Otherwise, you come here in order to get something -- which is the traditional way of doing things but this is spiritual selfishness. You fall prey to it every time you do something for your own benefit. For example: you want to acquire a state of perfection, possibly in order to help us. It still contains a desire to acquire a state of perfection in the first place and justification in the second place. The sentence: "I-want-to-be-perfect-in-order-to-participate" is a long one. The longer the sentence the more chance there is for trouble. so, if you "want-to-acquire-perfection-in-order-to-possibly-help..." there is room for a lot of trouble. We propose that you participate. It's much more direct.
We have a work going on here and lots of things to do. We wait only for the moment when you can share it. up to now you are not conscious of what is going on when we work; you simply acknowledge that there is a change going on. It's still very vague. If we ask you to define anything you can't. We expect at least some of you to be able to connect consciously. But you have to be work-centered. Every opportunity to move, to act has to be taken. I have tried to convey this in many forms for a long time now, and as you can see, globally speaking, we have not yet come through. You are still centered on yourself. Read the Statement of Purpose again. Let's approach it from another angle. You have to train yourself to see everything in terms of functions in order to balance what you were trained to do, that is, see everything in terms of "thingness". "That-thing-which-I-call-my- body-is-not-in-good-health-so-I-have-to-do-something-about-it-and-start..." You have to learn to see that same "thing" as a function.
And it is mandatory that you learn, at least the more mature of you, to go beyond the informative stage when I tell you that consciousness is reflecting something, which like every reflection is an inverse symmetry. You have to learn to see the function working directly.
I will give you an example: About a month ago we sent back an item we received from a mail order catalog, and then I completely forgot about. Lately, it came back to my mind. I wondered if the parcel was lost, or possibly they forgot about it. I thought perhaps I should write. This lasted for a full day. This was the reverse symmetry of what was actually going on; the parcel came the next day.
You will notice that the reflection, in this example was very poor, and reversed. There was a movement toward: "Maybe I have to do something" which was a reflection of the movement of the package coming.
When you have an uncomfortable urge toward something, that something is coming down. It is actually not a thing it's a function going on.
Wxhen you have that strong need it means some unconscious part of yourself is already working at it but the other way around. So you could participate in that working out rather than standing in the way.
If I take the example that I just gave with that parcel I would have written a letter, sent it, and received the parcel the next day.
My endeavors go against the current-- symbolically speaking, the parcel is coming and I go the other way around --unless I recognize that it is a reflection of an event.
So when you have a need to do something, be aware that this is a reflection, and ask yourself what is really going on -- what is the other side of the picture -- what kind of function is going on that creates that reflection. This is really important. It's really a reeducation of your consciousness. The reflection is not what is going on.
For some of you the need to perfect your instrumentality (body, feelings, sensory awareness, etc.) is very strong -- always to be better fit. Better fit for what? You build your fitness according to acquired references not according to what is going on. The "what is going on does not have any references.
The modification of your personality, way of life, quality, comes because you are acting. You change because you act, move, do something in the world. It is what comes out of the instrumentality that changes. If you come out with a higher value (or whatever you call it) you will find a response in every level of your personality, including the physical; you will come out with the radiation of a higher value. The conceptualizing makes you want to make the body or whatever more sensitive in order to be able to respond to higher values -- well, it doesn't work.
And sometimes in the endeavor to go ahead as fast, as possible, some of you do too much and use your reserves. If you want to be fit, your vitality has to be fully balanced. So, you have to establish a balance (as good as possible). The work we do (when you really work) taxes mainly the nervous system, so it has to be accompanied by the kind of relaxation that compensates for the kind of tension or energy you burn.
The more you work from down up the more you use those energies. The more you work field-first the less you burn your reserves. The problem then is not so much burning your reserves as changing the type of life prevailing in the body -- which sometimes asks for some time of adaptation.
You have a collective memory from the past of reaching higher so I can't blame you, it's inbred. This is a reflection of something coming down. Learn to notice and acknowledge it. First you have to experience it and then you can acknowledge it. If you only believe, it has no value whatsoever because it's not functional.
You have to learn to ask fewer and fewer questions, put less and less distance between you and what you do. For instance, you live a splendid A. But then you start thinking that in order to live A you must first do this and that and that. And you ask yourself "is A so and so; above the head or close; half in, half out; forward or a little further back?" And so on. The longer the sentence the more difficulties you have.
...When you live field-wise, don't do a thing. It just happens to work, so don't interfere. For most people, when they stop their mental activity, they pretend nothing is happening. What you have to get ready for, and I think you are from the condition you show: When that condition sets out, you can stop all enclosed activities but the action continues. You just acknowledge it's work. You don't have to do a thing. You don't even have to be self-reflexive. You can acknowIedge it is working and go off to do something, knowing perfectly well that it is going to continue throughout what you are doing. When you are through, you acknowledge it again, and see the change. It works. It does not stop working just because you haven't put your attention on it. 0ne of the big mistake everyone makes is to think that if you stop thinking nothing happens. Most minds are geared to think that an action stops when the attention is not on the point.
You have to have a different position: You very consciously don't stop the action, you allow it to continue. First you live the condition and when the condition is alive and working you let it continue while you do any chores you have to do. You will notice that at anytime you check, during or at the end of what you are doing, it's still active.
We do it all the time here, during speaking sessions. Something is set in motion and then we speak, we do whatever, and it still goes on.
This is what allows you to speak with someone and do something else at the same time. You set it in motion and then you are free to be as involved as you want in the speech. The action continues.
You tune into A and you are very busy observing it, instead of A flowing. You solve the problem by functioning. You teach children. Stand field-A in front of that class.Let it go on as you speak and take care of the children. From time to time just connect to see if it is still going on. If no, start again, until you learn that it goes on all the while you are centered on something else. You will observe that you don't need to be self-reflexive. The usual position of consciousness is to think that if you don't think about it it doesn't exist. So it doesn't show, it's blocked.
There is another thing you can do. When you observe A get the feel of the specific quality of the field, as you said, different from U for instance. So it has some specificity maybe not very clear but still something. Live the feel of it and forget the self-reflexiveness in order to live the feel which actually means you start living it. And when I say feel, it's not an emotional feeling, but we have no words for it. Do this until, at moments, you are completely full of the A quality, centered there, enormously wide, no thoughts.
The problem is not the A or the function, but rather the way we have been educated to acknowledge consciousness that is standing in the way. we have to find ways of living what is actually going on instead of being satisfied with noticing symptoms. The symptom is not the activity itself, it's only an effect. But when you see a symptom it reminds the consciousness that something is going on and you can live that something fully.
Participant: I'm not quite clear what the A center would do to manifest a result and my mind is stuck looking for a way the A function would manifest in a practical way.
Martin: Very well put and a common situation. The A is a function, technically speaking, way above thinking. It is directive and has no shape. Now your mind asks what shape it has, what consistency, what kind of effect -- all this for a function that has no shape. The position of your mind expects known references for something that is new, and pretends it can't work if it doesn't know.
That's how you were educated in school and so on -- that you have to know in order to do. Here you learn that something new is new -- that means that all references are useless. The sooner you live a condition without any reference, the better it will be.
You live the vastness called field. You live it. The livance is so full, so simultaneous, that if you pick one feature, then why not pick another -- then you get lost. That's not the way it works.
In this instance, you live A , strongly, fully, and then you feed it to your mind -- slowly, until the mind adjusts, because it is new for the mind. Of course, the mind registers some symptoms -- one of the most common is feeling taller relative to the space in which you live. Another is feeling straighter -- this has to do with verticality. These are symptoms -- it's not the action. The action is direction. Directiveness.
Participant: In a way, once the mind has said "A" it's sort of already a reflection of the thing going on.
Martin: That's a good point. You will notice for instance that when the mind says "live A", actually there are lots of feelings around the mind that are A oriented. Thus you have the statement of the mind that is an inverse picture of what is actually already going on. But if you acknowledge only the mind then the finer feelings are lost. If you are able to see what the mind does, you are also able to see that there are feelings already tuned to the situation, which provokes the reflection of the mind. It's a hard blow for the illusion of directing from the mind.
You have an idea popping up in the mind: "Let's do this or that". This means the action is already going on and the mind is just reflecting. If you are able to o serve that, then you might be able to tune directly into the action rather than relying on the reflection. You are not obliged to believe what the mind says.
Martin: Were they static or moving?
Participant: Moving. It seems like the dots and the space between the dots was obvious because something else was happening -- something else was coming in.
Martin: You will notice that there is still a self reflexiveness. You have the action going on (field and A center) and you acknowledging it. Now when you want to live a real A there is no acknowledgement.
Participant: How do you know you are doing it then?
Martin: Let's approach from a different angle. Live A as strong as you can, and see the type of awareness that you have. You get the livance, the feel of life, and now look over there (with Georgette). See the difference? She doesn't try to be aware of it. There is no reflexiveness. You get into another mode where it's there -- that's all. And the "there" implies a highly-active function -- but not in the mind's way. The purpose of training is precisely that.
A is a function. When you use it it has effects. Usually you feel that there is an A, or you feel a kind A note. But this is a function, it has to become operative. It's one thing to discover it and another thing to make it operative. These functions are not meant to reach a higher condition. They are meant to express creatively in the world. Always remember that.
The situation in which we are requires a different attitude of consciousness so that we can go further. Otherwise you simply wallow in spiritual selfishness --enjoying for yourself -- not realizing that we are involved in a work. If you really join in, the work is not a mystery. But you cannot join by acquiring qualities first. You can only join by joining. It's a fully creative position.
You think that we have to do something(for your benefit) -- you stay in a condition of expectancy. This is how you were born, but you are supposed to mature. There is a soul need in you, and a soul need is always a movement coming out. The use of the field, the centers, the use of the whole person allows that higher aspect of yourself to come through.
I have often said that I don't like the word "soul" because it has a connotation of thingness that does not allow you to see the function of it-- the same with your personality. Please remember that the world is as you see it only because of your frame of mind. You speak of a personality and a higher condition. There is no such thing past a certain point of maturity. The separation is only because of the inconsistency of the mind (which also implies emotions and sensory awareness). You allow the senses to perceive from here to there, and that's all. There is no limit in the perception -- none.
According to Steiner, when man was a "blob of heat" he was able, awareness-wise, to connect/commune with the life of the stars (any distance away). So that was the first condition of man when he began to build a body. It was the first condition in you. It's still there. How do you put that together with the mind as you know it -- with the sensory awareness as you know it? It is not a matter of reaching up. It's a matter of retraining your awareness.
Participant: Could you talk about the word "function".
You find the A function in the macrocosm, the whole universe an beyond, as well as in the tiniest aspect you can find. It is always the same function.
What you call "soul" is not an object, it's part of the U function. it is that part that is closest to consciousness just beyond. It is only an aspect of a function. The function itself is infinite.
If you want to know a function you have to make it move -- use it. If you mentalize about it it doesn't work.
If you really live field-A center, the radiation of the hand is field-A center. You don't need to do anything. It relates to the calisthenics we did with the hands. You know that it really works if you look at your hands and see it coming out. You can do it in front of a mirror to provide some distance for yourself. It comes out of the whole body. If you touch someone, it comes out. You don't need to do anything to bring it out. It is center-directed and not mind-directed. I have given you my secret of healing (or acting in whatever way). Field-in-the-first-place. The center becomes polarized and it is lived so strongly, it is so evident,that it flows out everywhere. So the activity of the hands will go along the same line -- which is very different from the endeavor to bring-something-out-of-the-hand-in-order-to. If you touch a person, or a flower, or a crystal, they will change accordingly. But if you touch a crystal, as I see some of you doing, with your minds, it won't change, except that it will express your desire for something special. The secret is very simple: Live it. But living does not mean imagining -- it's living. It deals with life directly.
When you experience what I have described, compare it, very consciously, with what you did when you wanted the hand to bring something out. The difference is drastic.
But if ...you-remember-in-vour-mind-that-you-have-to-activate-the-field-and-then-after-the-field-you-have-to-activate- the-A-center-and-then-you-have-to-live-that-so-strongly-that-it-comes-out
-of-the-hands... it does not work.
Participant: When I practice there is always a time when I have an impatience coming out. I want to do something, and it is so much in the way that it ruins everything. It's overwhelming sometimes.
Martin: You have the urge to do something-- this is a reflection of what? And when I say "what", the "what" lives in it's own mode. The "what" is not expressed in mind terms, it's expressed in livance terms.
You need to do something. It's the reflection of what? So you stop and you see there is something going on which triggers the need. So, you join in that. You acknowledge the expression the urge to do something. Even if you know theoretically that this is too much doing, you still acknowledge the urge because this is a sign, a symptom, of something going on. You have to accept it as a symptom. If you negate it you negate the symptom and then you have a much harder time.
You can also be more specific: You have an urge. You realize that it's not that -- it's a reflection. For most people, including every one of you, the first connection with a real field awareness is always very global, undifferentiated. It's only later on that it becomes very precise. But still, let say that it is undifferentiated but you really live it, you feel it. Now your urge to do something is undifferentiated also, but it is a need and the other is not. The expression of it is not clear, but the flow of it has a specific quality. Live the whole of that and the reflection (which I call need) -- not the form of it but the flow of it -- and as the flow moves you will notice that it synchronizes with some aspect in the field. So, from a clue that is not very definite, you can come (field-wise) to a point that is very definite.
Participant: You answered what I was after, because I have a need to know what would be the precise thing to do and yet I don't feel that I can direct it.
Martin: When you speak of your impatience, that impatience is specific. It's not global. You feel there is something to be done and you get impatient. Let the movement continue and live the whole. You will notice that in that whole there is a definite quality at work. Names are misleading but it's a kind of life, and not just any life. The impatience of one day is not the impatience of the next day. There are always different shades.
Is there any limit? I gave you Steiner's example of the birth of man (when he was a "blob of heat") -- being able to commune with the life anywhere. Steiner doesn't
speak of what was before that, so it's only a limited aspect, but for your consciousness it's rather big. The limits you know are those you put on yourself.
If you want to change, start moving -- field-wise. Actually there is more than field-wise, but at least do this. When everyone does this we will go further and bring into expression other aspects.
If you remember the hologram, the field is activated by a core activity from another order of life. Another order is something utterly, totally different. And your own center of gravity is there.
Please become active -- bring out. When you stand here give out -- not for yourself -- but practically. If you want an image: Bring out your divinity. "Man was created in the image and likeness of God".
.....As long as you are caught within the attraction of power you cannot assume higher responsibilities. It's not possible. This is speaking from the professional side. On the psychological side, you have to realize that when you acknowledge a power you acknowledge the apparent condition as being the base, and any "special faculty" is considered more than that -- thus a power. It is fascinating only as long as you consider the standard human condition as normal.
The present tendency is to balance the thingness by the dynamics of the whole (dynamics and functions belong in the same realm). You learn to see dynamics -- so much that the thing becomes an event. An event has no substance.
Then there is still another level where you don't speak of those two extremes: the dynamics of the whole and the particle.
Meaning, your power exists only because you accept the standard that you see everyday in the street. If I look at you (on the power level) to me it's very poor. It's true that it's fascinating and it's very "in" to have psychic powers and so on -- but it's very finite, very limited.
How do you live and act field-wise and live a power? Do you really feel that I have a special power in these sessions? Honestl#y, do you feel that? You feel that I'm different, yes, but compared to what you call power ...
......If we take the example of St. John of the Cross' golden middle way: you have material goodies on one side and spiritual goodies on the other side. The point is not to accept or reject powers, the point is to realize that when you function in this direction you limit yourself tremendously. As soon as you are geared on powers the vastness of the field is gone. You might feel a field but it might be an energetic field. It might be related to the aura, for instance, which is very concrete -- it's not the limitless field, it's only an aspect.
So when we sound the alarm, it simply means -- try again. Come out field-wise. different, yes, but compared to what you call power ...
Remember, the psychological sense of power means that you use some ability that you do not fully understand. it, appears very special. You have the power to work, but you don't call it power. Its too common.
If you have the feeling of power it means that you are not up to what you do. It's possible, you can have special training without everything being smooth all around, so that you peak in some ways and are very medium in others. So, your average awareness considers the peak as a power. If you peak everywhere it's no longer a power. It's a normal situation. When we work we know it's the normal condition -- no sense of power.
Something else too, when you have a sense of power you are aware of directing everything from the enclosed awareness. You might feel something around too, but your enclosed awareness holds it.
When we work, it does not go from me to you. The way it happens is: a kind of dynamic condition is triggered, a direction is given, and you happen to respond to it. When you respond to it, it means that what is triggered activates itself in you. That dynamic condition does it, not me. We might call that symbiosis or syntony in a lesser way. There is a live condition created and this works for everyone ---more or less consciously. It works as yours because it's your life --as you call it --- unless you give up the possessiveness. Then it's life. That's not what is called "Power".
If you are afraid of power, these are symptoms, so you cannot deny them, but you can live differently in front of everyday life. You can bring more into daily life than the limitation of a so-called power.
For your own brain reference: In some cases a power is useful -- as long as you handle it as a normal tool. But then you don't call it "power". Remember, your attraction with power always has to do with something you don't fully understand. This means you strive toward. Field-wise you come out, or you come down. Man is supposed to bring heaven on earth according to the symbolism -- that's a coming down. When you have a sense of power it always means you are going from the down position up. This is the reverse of the radiation. You are acting fully on the reflective side. You must learn to make the difference between action, which is direct, and reflex. A power is always reflected -- no matter how concrete and effective.
If you feel you direct some events everyone does it. You fit into events according to what you readiate. It's simply that you are usually not conscious of the process. If you think of an event, i.e. you want the event to go a certain way and it does, who is to say you did it or you sensed that it would go that way. You might simply have guessed that it would go that way and you formed the guess into a power to direct. You have to check these things if you are able to, because both situations are common. In some instances you direct something, and in others you just sense it and then you translate the sensing into whatever imagery you want. If you need to be someone big you might call it "power". If you are not concerned about that you might simply realize that you felt it.
It is an important subject because there is a chronic attraction toward power. Spiritual powers, healing powers, psychic powers, whatever.
And-there is always the golden middle way -- it's the least attractive one. But remember the imagery is one in which you go toward God. This is the reflection. What is the other way around? This is the real way it works. Find out for yourself. Not everyone is mature enough to face it.
The Experiment: Spaceless and Timeless
Close your eyes and imagine a starry night --- very clear, very beautiful. Extraordinarily vast, as you could feel/sense the whole univers -- completely limitless.
Continue to dwell in that limitless condition, but now you take the stars away, slowly or rapidly as you want, until none are left. There is now nothing -- and you are present in this condition without any shape -- simply present.
Now return the stars again --bright and beautiful.
Now take them off again, and continue to dwell in the limitlessness, in nothingness. Observe its quality. There is no object -- none.
Watch closely: Put one star in the middle, and as you place the star you will notice that the surface of the limitlessness has changed all around the star. Put all the stars back, and the space between the stars takes on a certain quality.
Take the stars away again, and that quality of space is gone with the stars. In your limitlessness there is no space.
As soon as you put one star back (or many) that quality which changes the limitlessness gives you the feel of space. Notice the change between the limitlessness, without object, and the same condition with object (which implies something around the object).
If we speak of a condition which is spaceless and timeless your mind has a a hard time trying to find out what it can be. Whereas, in this experiment, you realize that you can actually sense it, and even if it is not complete, it's still sufficient to make the difference between a condition that has no time and space and one that has time and space. Your mind is too much involved in the thingness, considering itself a star in that space, thus implying space. If you have no-thing left, space is gone. You are active but the mode is different.
What I want to compare is that in the condition with thingness (stars), you could possibly see yourself growing until you are a lofty Divine Being. When you take the stars away, you stand here with three -and-one-half eternities as this being. And if you can be completely mind-free, you don't even think of three and one half eternities. I say this because this reference exists in books. The actual experience is quite a bit different. And the experience is here -- it's simply that it's a timeless and spaceless here. it's a timeless , spaceless now -- that enormous fullness of presence. And it's not static, it's very active.
Please notice that in that vastness, limitless space, there is no feeling of evolution. It is a now that is not related to time and space. It is a now in which time and space are incidental - they are used or not used, depending on what you have to do. You can be perfectly whole in that condition -- no becoming. The sense of evolution is gone. All constructs are gone.
When we work, the main part is without the component of time and space. It is now. Do you begin to realize against what odds we are playing when you ferociously stick to evolution, not acknowledging that there are other aspects.
You will notice that when you make the contrast between thingness and nothingness, when thingness is gone, everything is gone -- including your normal awareness. Of course, you will be self-reflexive, meaning some awareness of what is going on will pop up. This is a thingness, so take it away and the thingness or the wanting to do it is included. The point is not whether they are right or wrong, the point is to live nothingness. The difference is immediate (without mediation). Just do it.
Live nothingness and then live field-wise and center on A. You will notice immediately that thingness is here you have destroyed nothingness. One day, you will live that no thingness in the first place and bring forth that center called "A" from the nothingness into activity or (as people say) into being -- it's a true creation.
For those who could not sense these two positions significantly, I ssuggest that you don't go to far. Just learn to live in the world with thingness (stars) and the world of nothingness(without stars). The background is black in both positions -- simply, the quality of life changes. Later you will notice that the nothingness background is still present with the thingness -- simultaneously and unchanged. What looks like a change is just an appearnace on it.
You will notice that the components called time and space are only two components,or if you lwant , one time-space continuum. When you have have nothingnessit is all- encompassing. It is when you can really tune the awareness of "you", that which says"I" to nothingness, that you can live not being a thing. Then there is fullness. Then you realize that evolution is a point of view. You simultaneously live "the Great Dance".
In terms of evolution, it has to take place somewhere. So, you have your starry sky. But the starry sky is only a feature in the starless condition. The limitless condition contains everything, including space and time. The now contains everything, including the evolutionary process. The evolutionary process is only an aspect, a relatively tiny aspect, of the whole,that is going on. And the trouble we have to bring you to act in what we do is in the biggest part on this point. we see you as entities in a now which does not contain space and time, or rather in which space and time are only incidental.
Suppose you live that every day, and come here with the fullness of that now -- in which there is no becoming. When you begin to live that now, you begin to realize that we are here to do something. The scale of evolution is just incidental in the work being done.
We come to that "shocking" position of the fullness of you being here now -- limitless, timeless, spaceless. If you want to help, come out from this position into time and space. It is utterly different from anything you know -- but no less real.
Live this condition and see how you deal with your consciousness. All the constructs that seem to be absolutely needed... and suddenly you realize that all that is here already. Not in the aspects of space and time, but these are not the only aspects.
When you allow yourself to dwell in that continuum which has no space and no time -- no thing--- your constructs are gone, and the knowledge of how to do what you have to do comes with you -- even if you didn't know it the second before..
You will notice that when you become able to live nothingness, you will have lost that type of identity that is called the ego. You still have to say "I", but the feel of the ego is gone -- the egoic thingness is gone. And if you say "I" or "we" it makes no difference because it's neither -- it's simply a requirement of the language.
In time to come, man will realize -- there cannot be other than now. This is quite real and it is with this that we work. It's a challenge for the consciousness --a readjustment.
The point is to live that spacelessness, really, with no thing, and in the beginning it won't -- be easy. If we do it together it be easier because there is a certain volume, but when you are alone you don't have that volume, unless you connect to everyone. But usually you are more separate and more self-centered.
Play around with this until you can really live the differences -- quality-wise and presence-wise.
In the meantime, continue with field-in-the-first-place and the A center until it becomes active, working.